Response to Aaron Godwin

Aaron, your opening sentence was on point. You had a nice suspense builder when you talked in detail about all the items you chunked at your brother. I could not wait to read what you threw at him. Good thing you did not get him in the eye or something, it could have been much worse. Having three sisters I know the aggravation and fustration they can put on me and I would gladly chunk a hair brush or water bottle to get my point accross. The structure of your story was good, you had a lot of detail and diversity of words. I enjoyed reading your piece because it reminds me of my siblings and times where we would do something wrong and we did exactly as you, HIDE!! You also had some great transition words, and no run on sentences. The fact that your favorite show was “The Price is Right” is funny because whenever we had babysitters, that is what we normally watched. The flow of your story was great! As I was reading, the words in every sentence seemed to workout in your favor. It was very smooth reading. I could definately decyfer the tone of your story.

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